08.09.2024

i swing with full force, striking the nail, knowing full well that it is pointless.

the self destruction, the numbing, the running away from this craft and pursuit of my soul.

i drink, i smoke, i eat, i wake up the phone, knowing all too well that my body can't handle it and will need to rest eventually. it is a bottomless cave. it's all fucking candy.

i blame others: guests, family, friends, anyone but me. they are the problem. it can't possibly be me.

delusion.